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Zfert
07-27-2015, 03:35 AM
Heres mine:

I entered ten puns in a pun contest for my local newspaper. I was hoping at least one would win, but no pun in ten did.


Let the punishment begin

HerobrineFan
07-27-2015, 03:42 AM
Where do astronauts eat?

The launchpad

I'm sorry

Zfert
07-27-2015, 03:46 AM
Where do astronauts eat?

The launchpad

I'm sorry

Dont get me started on space puns, I have an astronomical amount.

SuddenRush
07-27-2015, 03:47 AM
Why did the chicken laugh?

Because my pun was egglarious ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

|ThyLuigi|
07-27-2015, 04:26 AM
Wow, the amount kf puns in this thread is eggsravagant. It really is quite punny. Now, let us discuss the leggalities of this document we must sign.

Megazork
07-27-2015, 04:29 AM
Dont get me started on space puns, I have an astronomical amount.

I think space puns would be good. It would give me an incentive to start doing something and not space out. Ahahahahaha

kys megazork

KKcupcake
07-27-2015, 04:30 AM
is this a pun?
two hats were talking.
one said you stay here, i'm just gonna go on ahead
heheh, got it from a one direction concert.

TheHelper
07-27-2015, 04:30 AM
Can you all eggsplain what's happening?

Shadin Siddique
07-27-2015, 04:34 AM
You have cat to be kitten me right meow!

You have got to be kidding me right now!
That's just because if you don't understand the pun. :rolleyes:

iJubilant
07-27-2015, 04:38 AM
When Someone Calls, the phone goes "green green".
when The Person Picks Up, the person say "yellow Yellow"
When the person is about to hang up, it goes " pink pink"
is this a pun? but i bet is a bad one...

Berenice
07-27-2015, 05:11 AM
Wow these puns are eggscelent, keep them coming.
I wouldn't say they're eggstraodinary tho.

Mark Chong
07-27-2015, 05:14 AM
This is so punny
No, I am bad at puns

Its Daniel
07-27-2015, 06:22 AM
Zfert pls, don't Zfart.

I'm sorry :c

GummiBear64
07-27-2015, 06:29 AM
The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.

Festivity
07-27-2015, 06:38 AM
I wasn't eggspecting this egg would be eggselent! :crazy:

ianCSzz
07-27-2015, 06:44 AM
I was in an outdoor math class playing Growtopia, expected a sin but I got a tan instead.

PolarisHD
07-27-2015, 02:20 PM
Not my own pun, but here:


http://i.imgur.com/UmDc2I0.jpg

raqk
07-27-2015, 02:23 PM
I donut understand puns.

BioTestificate
07-27-2015, 02:36 PM
Where do alien cows came from?












MOOn

BallsOfLove
07-27-2015, 02:37 PM
this game

^ik cheesy joke

Jackk
07-27-2015, 02:39 PM
Did you here about the guy whose left side got chopped off? It's okay, he's all right now.

BioTestificate
08-02-2015, 09:38 AM
Did you here about the guy whose left side got chopped off? It's okay, he's all right now.

WHY DID YOU MAKE ME REMEMBER MARCO IN THIS? WHYYYYYYYY?
IK it's his other side ot whatever.

ImAPogo
08-02-2015, 09:47 AM
Egg,egg,egg,I wonder where are you.

In the toilegg

Im bad at pun

Areodax
08-02-2015, 09:50 AM
hey wanna hear a joke?

you just heard it :crazy:

IZwin
08-02-2015, 09:52 AM
What do you call an owl magician? Hoo-dini... :o

Raiggu
08-02-2015, 09:56 AM
Umm worry but idk whats pun :sweatdrop:

VladmirTootn
08-02-2015, 09:57 AM
Did you hear about the guy whose whole left side was cut off?







He's all right now.


:3

SnowKuro
08-02-2015, 10:01 AM
Seariously? There's a thread for puns?
This will just fish the punners

Water you gonna do when they come, laugh?
Sink about it twice

Ok im so done

proman340
08-02-2015, 10:23 AM
You are making no sense.

You mean non-sense? xD

DarkFizzix
08-02-2015, 10:44 AM
Want me to tell you a story about a broken sword? nvm there's no point

:cry::cry::cry::cry::cry:

ImAPogo
08-02-2015, 10:51 AM
What do you call an owl magician? Hoo-dini... :o

Its actually What do you call a magic owl?













Hoo



Dini

iCashGT
08-02-2015, 10:52 AM
I was hungry for puns so I decided to have puncakes.

Top notch joke.

Arcyus
08-02-2015, 10:58 AM
My little puny

- - - Updated - - -


I was hungry for puns so I decided to have puncakes.

Top notch joke.
Ask PunnyFlan for Puncakes.

ImAPogo
08-02-2015, 11:00 AM
What does the pun say?

They just say puns.

iCashGT
08-02-2015, 11:01 AM
My little puny

- - - Updated - - -


Ask PunnyFlan for Puncakes.

Im dead.

What the heck dude xD

Arcyus
08-02-2015, 11:05 AM
Im dead.

What the heck dude xD
Rest in puns
ICashGT
2k14 - 2k15

ImAPogo
08-02-2015, 11:18 AM
What do you call a joke that Vanoss made?

87105

IceKane
08-02-2015, 11:25 AM
Ouch, a book just fell on my head. It myshelf to blame.

Evets1
08-02-2015, 08:57 PM
Oh hi.

What did the clock do when it was still hungry? It went back four seconds.
why me

Zfert
08-02-2015, 08:58 PM
I used to be a banker, but I lost intrest.

Applez
08-02-2015, 09:00 PM
Becoming a vegetarian is a huge missed steak.

Mrs.TommoSwag
08-02-2015, 09:22 PM
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

MagicDragon
08-02-2015, 10:09 PM
fish go to school for de bait ( debate )


the proffesor found out that hes theory of earthquakes was on shakey grounds


what is a bear without an ear B !

PURPLE585
08-02-2015, 10:10 PM
your worst pun

SnowKuro
08-02-2015, 10:56 PM
your worst pun

.........
I admit it. I lost.

DumbOldDoor
08-02-2015, 11:09 PM
This is going to be a beat hard.

That's so bad I'm not even sure if it's considered a pun

Boomer
08-02-2015, 11:14 PM
Two guys are talking about their GFs. One says "I can't believe how hot my GF is..." The other says "I see your point," then stands up.

Zfert
08-04-2015, 03:54 PM
id tell u a chemistry joke but i know i wouldn't get a reaction

Hans
08-04-2015, 03:58 PM
id tell u a chemistry joke but i know i wouldn't get a reaction

your worse pun

Arnold
08-04-2015, 05:30 PM
Eye gotchu a pun.

Why did everyone run away from Zfert?

Cause he was going to release Zfart!

lolgal96
08-04-2015, 09:40 PM
did you ever read the book about the turtle who hurt himself?
it was written by Michelle Hurtz.

courtesy of my seventh grade science teacher

Zfert
08-05-2015, 01:25 AM
did you ever read the book about the turtle who hurt himself?
it was written by Michelle Hurtz.

courtesy of my seventh grade science teacher

that was terrible

i love it

Derekk
08-05-2015, 01:26 AM
If you're in a graveyard at 3 am in the morning and hear things you're in grave danger

:nope: so bad

DeathSkull
08-05-2015, 01:28 AM
I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

This one still makes me lmao

Zfert
08-05-2015, 01:28 AM
If you're in a graveyard at 3 am in the morning and hear things you're in grave danger

:nope: so bad

*goes to graveyard*

*accidently knocks "G" off sign"

http://i.imgur.com/JFV53aY.gif

For those who dont get it
graveyard

Rizelle22
08-05-2015, 01:34 AM
Dont get me started on space puns, I have an astronomical amount. I love puns

iEmeraldBoy
08-05-2015, 01:42 AM
Why can't you here a pterodactyl use the bathroom

cause the "P" is silent
:crazy:

- - - Updated - - -

Hear sorry lol

- - - Updated - - -

Whoops that was just a bad joke lol

IC Growtopia
08-05-2015, 01:42 AM
Why is peter pan always flying? because he never lands.
I love this joke because it never grows old.
has a nice hook to it right?
I don't get, I'm lost boys.
Beats smee.

What's the difference between a piano, a tuna, and a tub of glue.
You can tuna a piano but you can't piano a tuna.
:D
What about the tub of glue?
I knew you'd get stuck on that!

So the dog walks up to the farmer and says, here you go, all 30 sheep.
30? I only count 26!
the dog says; I know, I rounded them up!

I have more.

iEmeraldBoy
08-05-2015, 01:47 AM
Ok I got on
Where does a pirate goto eat?
Arrrrrrbys

GTevil
08-05-2015, 01:58 AM
When I see stairs, I know they are "Up" to something :sweatdrop:

Kroakie
08-05-2015, 02:01 AM
You can tune a piano, but you can't Tune-a-FISH.

Zfert
08-05-2015, 02:03 AM
When I see stairs, I know they are "Up" to something :sweatdrop:

the quality of these puns just keep going down

I dont know how many of these I have left in me

keep it up lol

DeathSkull
08-05-2015, 02:05 AM
http://justsomething.co/wp-content/uploads/2014/04/21-of-the-worst-puns-121.jpg

Zfert
08-05-2015, 02:11 AM
not putting pic again cause that would be annoying

http://i.imgur.com/vfZNu.jpg

DeathSkull
08-05-2015, 02:14 AM
Lol not quoting your pic either :p

http://www.learnsomething.tips/wp-content/uploads/2014/02/345458o.jpg

DeathSkull
08-05-2015, 02:21 AM
Got another....

Cat puns freak meowt, like seriously I am not kitten.

iLikeCheez
08-05-2015, 02:22 AM
Heres mine:

I entered ten puns in a pun contest for my local newspaper. I was hoping at least one would win, but no pun in ten did.


Let the punishment begin

your worst pun. Hahahahaha Zfert best mod ever keep up the good work!

DeathSkull
08-05-2015, 02:34 AM
Fly: Hey bug on my back, are you a mite?

Bug: I mite be.

Fly: Stupidest pun I have ever heard.

Bug: What do you expect? I made it up on the fly..

Hans
08-05-2015, 04:02 AM
all of ur puns are killing me.

Arcyus
08-05-2015, 07:26 AM
all of ur puns are killing me.
So I am a murderer now ?

Ritzy
08-05-2015, 07:44 AM
Elevators are so annoying... They drive me up the wall!

The best way to get your phone to sync is name it Titanic

What do you call an own who does magic? Hoo-dini

- - - Updated - - -

I got another, what did the pirate say when he turned 80? Aye matie! Think about that....

ImAPogo
08-05-2015, 08:00 AM
What do you call a magic owl?

HOO


DINI

btw this is not a copy from ritzy as he said Own who does magic.....

SnowKuro
08-05-2015, 08:12 AM
I need to write a biting puns...
Ill just go with normal lines
Im not doing this on purpoise ok

Whatever im fin with all of the puns

DarkFizzix
08-05-2015, 10:51 AM
I'd trash my crystal clock right now but I would be wasting precious time.

Zfert
08-05-2015, 06:27 PM
My friend wanted to buy a banana suit, but i didn't find it very apeeling.

MrPigster
08-05-2015, 06:31 PM
"This is a tearable pun" lel

smartsmile
08-06-2015, 04:09 AM
I'm feline purrfect
please prepare for puurbulence
do you need a puuramedic?
live long and prospuur
i would move mewotains for you
i bought a boat because of the pier pressure
these puns are clawful
im pawy for making awful puns
these puns make me feel Uncatfurabell

these puns are a cat-tastrophe

Bruce Wayne
08-06-2015, 04:12 AM
What does Batman put in his drinks?


Just Ice.

87561

smartsmile
08-06-2015, 05:57 PM
why die so early

atwistoffate
08-06-2015, 05:58 PM
https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/236x/5c/b3/da/5cb3da41d79862a0e7d10188e77035ef.jpg

Kibiras07
08-06-2015, 06:17 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nd4GBB1s3s

I guess Nigel De Jong was feeling Xabi after that tackle :D

Orange guy's name is Nigel De Jong, the blue guy's name is Xabi (pronounced "Chabby")... Xabi (Chabby) - Shabby

MBG090
08-06-2015, 06:19 PM
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0nd4GBB1s3s

I guess Nigel De Jong was feeling Xabi after that tackle :D

Orange guy's name is Nigel De Jong, the blue guy's name is Xabi (pronounced "Chabby")... Xabi (Chabby) - Shabby

I play soccer/football a lot and I'm pretty sure it's pronounced either "Habi" or "Zhabbi"

Kibiras07
08-06-2015, 07:01 PM
I play soccer/football a lot and I'm pretty sure it's pronounced either "Habi" or "Zhabbi"

Definitely not Habi, look it up on Google.



Well I gave it a try at least.